I’ve mentioned a few times before that Classified is moving into lesser known territory for me and starting to release figures based on characters that came out after I had sort of grown out of GI JOE. Now, that doesn’t mean I’m not familiar with these characters, indeed I wound up picking up the 25th Anniversary figures of a lot of them as an adult collector. It just means that I don’t have the same childhood nostalgia for these. And Croc Master definitely fits that bill. Cobra’s reptile trainer first hit the shelves around 1987-88. I was 15 and my life was all about watching Star Trek and Doctor Who, and less about playing with toys. He was also too late to be featured in the Sunbow cartoon, so as cool as he was, he was an unknown to me. But that’s not to say I’m not absolutely chuffed to get him!

Croc Master, founder of the ill-conceived “let’s use giant reptiles instead of dogs for security as a business model” Guard Gators, Inc., comes as a Deluxe set in a big window box and bundled with Fiona, his pet croc and a bunch of accessories. This set makes a good argument in favor of the window boxes, because you really do get to see all the cool stuff you’re getting in here and the toys look great against the crimson Cobra artwork printed on the cardboard backer. Let’s take a look at Croc Master first…

Oh yeah! By 1987 Cobra was really committing to becoming a right bunch of glorious weirdos. Maybe they were just embracing their newly discovered Cobra-La origins. Either way, Croc Master is practically the poster child for this new Cobra, looking every bit like DC Comics’ Bane with a reptile fetish. This guy is jacked and more than a little bit terrifying. His croc-skinned onesie is punctuated in the middle by a silver and yellow belt with one giant croc eye painted on the buckle. He’s got black trousers, reptile boots, and a brown holster and sheath strapped to his legs. One bold silver arm bracer is locked around his right forearm while a coiled reptile skin one adorns his left. I really dig the sculpted Cobra medallion on his chest and the painting and detail on the croc skin shirt is just superbly done. You can call him goofy, but don’t try to tell me you wouldn’t be shitting your pants if this guy came running at you in the middle of a swamp.

The head sculpt really drives home that Bane flavor. Croc Master has a form-fitting black hood with a giant silver breather mask covering his mouth and nose. There’s a black hose that leads off the side and connects to a horizontal canister across his back. Maybe this is oxygen so he can lie in wait under the water, but I’d like to think that this is just so he can breath horrible swamp gas wherever he goes. The deep crimson eyes contribute nicely to the intimidation factor here.

Croc’s more normal accessories consist of a fighting knife and a pistol, each of which can be stored on his person in the sheath and holster. The pig-sticker is mostly bare gray plastic, but it does have some green paint on the wrapped handle, giving it a bit of personality.

The pistol is a beefy, all black magnum revolver, which I think suits him pretty well. It’s fun to imagine that when he pulls this and shoots you, he’s just going for the knees because he wants you alive and screaming when his crocs eat you.

Similarly, his giant hook is likely embedded into your flesh so he can drag you back to the Croc Pens, Leatherface style, and drop you in. Yeah, this was a great idea for an accessory! There are a lot of horror elements tied up with this guy.

And his final accessory is a big coiled whip. This is a cool accessory, but I find it disappointing to think that Croc Master whips his beloved crocs. Then again, he is a bad guy, so he probably does. The whip is cast in soft plastic, but it pretty much stays with the end coiled up, which works better for posing than it does play.

And then there’s Fiona, which is a hell of a pack in, as it uses more plastic than Croc Master himself. And hey, if you’re in the market for a 6-inch scale croc, Fiona is the girl for you! The sculpted detail on this beast is absolutely gorgeous with every inch of her covered in scales or rough textured skin. Her legs are articulated with rotating hinges at the ankles and again where they meet the body. She also has points at the base of the tail and at the neck.

Of course, the upper jaw is articulated and she can open up nice and wide to better showcase those lovely teeth. Look at them snappers! This is an all around amazing toy and I can pretty much guarantee that my Hasbro Indiana Jones will be meeting Fiona at some point or another.

Croc also has a spiked collar and leash for Fiona. The whole thing is cast in soft plastic and the collar fits right over her head so he can better keep her under control.

And last but not least, Hasbro threw in too little baby crocs: One green and one albino! These are just simple static pieces, but oh so damn adorable! Why did they bother including these? I don’t know, but I’m glad they did!

Croc Master was released quite a while ago, so he’s one of those figures that has been languishing on my backlog for bit. I’m glad I finally got around to opening him, because this is an absolutely killer set, no pun intended. Croc Master himself is a fun design with some great paint and detail, but Fiona comes pretty close to stealing the show here while offering a lot of crossover potential for other toy lines in this scale. He was originally released at around $40, which is a damn fine value for what you’re getting, but nowadays you can find him for even less online. At some point, he may even drop low enough for me to pick up a second set just for another Fiona!