Masters of the Universe Classics: Batros by Mattel

Wow, we are officially at the halfway mark for Matty’s Filmation Club. Yes, Batros was last month’s figure, but I’m still rather backlogged with my receivings so I’m only getting to him now. But hey, it’s October! Halloween is coming and Batros seems somehow appropriate.

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There’s the awesome green brick, Greyskull-inspired MOTUC packaging. Once again, despite the fact that Batros is a release in their spin-off Filmation sub, the package is identical to the mainstream releases. There isn’t even a sticker on the bubble that says, “It’s Filmation, bitches!” That’s fine for me because I’m about to tear this thing up to get at my toy. But first, let’s check out the back panel of the card.

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Of the six figures pictured, I am missing only Stinkor and Webstor. I really need to pick those guys up. You also get the usual bio, in this case declaring Batros as a Master Thief, only more awkwardly worded as “Evil Master of Theft.” I am reminded of the exchange between Yuri Orlov and Andre Baptiste Sr.: “They say that I am The Master of Theft, but I believe it is you. “I believe it’s Master Thief.” “Thank you, but I prefer it my way.” What’s that? Oh, shit… I thought I could distract you all with a Lord of War film reference to make you forget that I’m committed to watch the episode this guy is in. Ok dokey… The episode in question is called “The Great Books Mystery.” Let me pour myself a Jameson and I’ll be back in about 25 minutes.

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So, all the books in The Palace have gone missing! I could see this being a problem, because I adore books, but the King’s main concern isn’t the books themselves, but the great loss of knowledge. Yes, it’s only natural that a society that has lasers and robots doesn’t have any of that precious knowledge stored on computer archives. Oh yeah, before that we get to see Adam and Teela at Gym Class and nothing beats Adam and Cringer’s expressions while checking out Teela’s ass as she climbs the rope. Ok, let me just jump straight to Batros. He stole the books so that the people will force the King to step down and make Batros the Emperor of all Eternia. Seems legit. Despite his insane scheme, Batros is pretty badass and he shoots lasers out of his hands that sometimes create snakes out of thin air. He quickly bests Teela, Orko, Beastman, and Trapjaw, and presents himself to Skeletor as his equal. The two partner up to go after Greyskull, making The Great Eternian Book Caper really just a red herring to tie in with the weekly PSA about how awesome reading is, when it should have been how you’re going to burn in the special hell, if you steal people’s books. Seriously, I don’t lend books to anyone. Oh yeah, Prince Adam’s birthday gift of choice is a book of unicorn pictures… ‘nuff said. Is that enough? Can I get to the figure now?

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Good! Because Batros is a pretty cool figure. You get a basic MOTUC buck sculpted in a really nice, pale purple. The familiar bracers and belt are painted glossy black and the furry boots and diaper are painted blue. There’s nothing groundbreaking on the body, but you do get a new chest harness with a bat emblem sculpted onto the front of it.

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The head sculpt is excellent! It works wonderfully as a modern update to the Filmation character. I’d say it stays closer to the artwork than Icer did, but that was a good choice on both fronts. The hair texture for the hood is great and I particularly love the little notches in his bat ears… nice touch. The lower part of the cowl is a separate piece, so as not to interfere with the head articulation. Tiny little fangs and the yellow eyes with black mascara tie the portrait up nicely.

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And then there are the wings. I wasn’t sold on the wings in the initial press shots of this figure. Later, I saw the artwork and thought better about them. Now that the figure is in hand, I’m still a little torn. The wings are sculpted directly into the figure’s biceps. They’re scaled correctly. They have a nice, leathery texture sculpted into them. They look really good in a few key poses. But there are other poses, where they don’t look so good, because they just seem to stop at his shoulders. It begs the question… is this guy actually part bat or a guy in a bat costume? I don’t know, but the wings don’t always look natural.

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Articulation is standard MOTUC fare. Do I really need to go through it? Oh, alright. The arms feature ball jointed shoulders, swivels in the biceps and wrists, and hinged elbows. His legs feature ball jointed hips, and hinges in the knees and ankles. He can swivel at the waist, has the ab crunch in his torso, and a ball jointed head. The nice thing about the wings is that they don’t inhibit his articulation in the slightest.

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Batros comes with an amazing spiked mace. I don’t remember him having it in the episode, so I’m not sure if this is a repack from a figure I don’t have, or an homage to someone else’s weapon. Either way, this thing is bad ass and he looks great holding it.

And that, my friends, is Batros. Despite the fact that I waffle over his wings, I still think this is a really great figure and another slam dunk for the Filmation Sub. He’s a great treatment of another one-off villain that looks perfectly at home standing on my shelf amidst all the other freaks and weirdoes of Eternia. He’s fun to play with and another reason I’m so very glad I subbed this little sub-line.

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